Do you or don't you

i am generally open-minded about fashion, and i approach all the options with healthy curiosity (this naturally led to my need for paring down). in contrast, i know people who just instinctively have a lot of rules about what they will wear. it is interesting to note that when they rattle them off to me the rules are actually for what they will not wear. you might argue that the list is one and the same, because the space left blank in one list is the very thing that builds the content of the other (eg. “i won’t wear skirts” translates to “i will wear pants” etc.) but i see a difference in the mentality, if not the practical results.
why is it easier to commit to a list of “don’t” than it is to a list of “do”? i have a theory. i think the list of don’t is easily created from past experience, failed attempts, what we’ve learned, etc. the do list is, well, is only possible to create if you’ve reached an understanding of yourself. i’m beginning to feel like a do list is possible for me. not quite, but almost.

which is easier for you?


Anonymous said...

"don't" is a lot easier. because it doen't require thinking. it's a self made rule. it's a simple solution of giving up.

is this why i "don't" wear makeup?

Iheartfashion said...

Despite having a pretty well-developed sense of my own style, I wouldn't rule anything out. I can't think of a thing that's a "never" for me. It's always fun to be unexpected (maybe a touch eccentric) and break the rules a bit.

Carlene said...

I used to really pay attention to what the "what not to wear" types said about what not to wear (notice it's never What To Wear; it's easy to say give a blanket NO, it'll cover the majority maybe?) with regard to Aging, i.e., what women shouldn't be caught sporting after a certain age, etc. Bah humbug. I'm (finally) learning what looks good on me, and some of those things are on their NO list. (long hair; sleeveless tops).


Many times I say no to the details...NO cap sleeves, puffed sleeves, ruffled sleeves, sleeves with elastic around the bottom, batwings, dolmans, etc. (sleeve issues much?) I am left with virtually nothing. Find me a t-shirt with some sense of style (i.e., non-frumpy) that has regular (i.e., more than 1" under the arms) sleeves. Please?

What am I trying to say here? We might have more DOs if we had better options (not more options), or could design our own clothes.

Carlene said...

Ooh, ooh, wait! How about those articles that say "dress for your body type," only they only show you how to HIDE your particular body type (with whatever they are selling, but that's not the point...) Lots of DONTs, those are easy, but all the DOs are how to hide stuff. I AM interested in how I might dress for my body type with what's currently available in stores, but not necessarily interested in camouflage.

Have I veered completely off topic yet?

laurieann said...

Carlene, it sounds like you and I have some very similar experiences. I'm finding very little in the way of good styling and good fabrics that are flattering to my body type. But I too digress.

Getting back to the topic at hand there are very few particular items that are on my "don't" list. My only firm rule is shorts, they just don't (there's that word again) look good on me. I wear skirts and pants as the mood strikes me. Dresses can be difficult for me to find but I have two for fall that I really enjoy wearing. I didn't wear boots with dresses or skirts until a few years ago and now I love the look.

I'm going to play $.02 psychologist and suggest that one of the reasons people reach for the word don't so much quicker than for the word do is from childhood. For every time my mother said "do" I'm sure she told me "don't" 20 times over. Just a thought.

GenX Theorist said...

Yeah - Carlene - I'm with you on the articles.

You know, I've saved my Vogues for the last few years and I was recently flipping through some old ones and I re-found an article that I had dog-eared....Vogue can be mostly taken with a grain of salt body-type wise, but every now and then they do something that blows my mind and this shoot was a "fashion made for curvy girls" one with some gorgeous dresses.

It was so exciting to see an article saying "this is made for YOU!" vs. "don't wear this".